Prayer
We have talked a lot during this course about the 'facts' of Christianity, those things which Christians believe to be true - and you have considered some of these things and whether or not you believe them to be true. And I hope that you have learnt a lot about Jesus. However, there is all the difference in the world between knowing about a person and knowing a person. For instance, I know about Bob Dylan. I can tell you countless useless facts about Bob Dylan. I can tell you about all of his different albums, which one is the most popular, which ones are really lame. I can tell you about his appalling film career and his surreal poetry. I can tell you loads about Bob Dylan. I know about Bob Dylan. But, and this is what makes me seem even sadder, I've never met him! I've never looked into his eyes. I've not been to a concert of his. I've not so much as shaken his hand. I can read about his likes and dislikes, but I don't really know what he is like as a person, because I don't know him.
And, one of the traps that we can fall into when we're looking at Christianity - and this is something that I have to remember at College - is thinking that because we know about God, we know God. It's just not true. BUT, one of the pillars of Christianity, which hopefully you've picked up on, is that we can know God. Remember Mike's illustration last week, with the two sides of the cliff and the bridge in the middle? Because of the death of Jesus, we can walk across that bridge right into the arms of God. You and I can know God. Isn't that incredible? You can actually have a relationship with God. Now, you won't often see me excited, but that, to me, is worth getting excited about.
So, tonight we are gonna talk about prayer, one or the main ways that we express and enjoy that relationship with God. And I am gonna ask - and hope to answer - some really basic questions. You'll see from your Alpha manuals that this talk is entitled, 'How and Why should I pray?' Well, we are gonna ask all those questions, how do I pray? Why should I pray? When should I pray? What is prayer? and so on. What, why, how, when and where. Okay? Then let's start with a prayer...
What is prayer?
Communication with God?
As a kid, were you taught to pray before you went to bed? Or, maybe at Dinner-Time? "For what we are about to receive may the Lord make us truly thankful, Amen." One of the things that you might have been taught was, "Hands together; eyes closed" - or, "Eyes together, hands closed" as our slightly scatty Head-Master used to say. You might have been taught that prayer only really counts if you've got your eyes closed. If so, you might find it interesting to look through the Gospels and see occasions when Jesus prays. Very often, he looks up to heaven - with is eyes open - and prays aloud.
We might think that prayer is about saying the right words. You have to start with "Dear Jesus," or "Heavenly Father" and you have to finish with "In Jesus name" or our Head-Master used to finish with "For Jesus sake" which really confused me because my Dad had taught me that that was rude!
Prayer is not a case of bringing your shopping-list before God, as if he was some kind of Cosmic Santa-Claus. It includes bringing your concerns before God, but that is not the essence of prayer. You see prayer, is partly about communication with God. And that includes telling God what is on your mind, praising him, confessing your sin, thanking God, asking for help and on and on and on. Prayer is nothing less than communication with God. But it is also a whole lot more.
Communion with God
The truth is that prayer isn't about the words you say or how you say them. One of the great things about the prayers throughout the Bible is that they are all different. Prayer is about a relationship with God. And we all relate to people differently and in that sense we are all going to relate to God slightly differently. And a relationship - though it cannot exist without words - is a whole lot more than words. So, it is important to remember that when we talk about 'prayer' we are talking about being in communion with God. Do you know what I mean by 'communion'? It's about fellowship, friendship, relationship.
We quoted a verse last week that I would like to return to; it's Rev. 3:20:
Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.
The wonderful thing about this verse is that it describes how we become Christians - we open the door of our hearts and give God free reign to come in - but it also describes how we be Christians. Prayer is about having an open heart to God and the result is described in that intimate phrase - I will come in and eat with him, and he with me. So, prayer is about having a relationship with God and enjoying and expressing that communion.
Why Pray?
But why should we pray? I mean, lets face it, we are far too busy trying to get by in the 21st Century, without having to carve into our time-table to pray. Can't we leave prayer to the Monks and Nuns? Well, I hope that the 'why' of prayer has been answered by looking at the 'what' or prayer. If prayer is about having that relationship with God, then we pray because there is nothing greater we could be doing! Don't ask me why I talk to my wife; I can't put it into words. Well, some of it I could: we had to discuss what we're doing for Christmas, we had to agree on a name for our new baby... But, ultimately, I talk to my wife because I love her. Because I have that relationship with her and I want to make the most of that relationship. Why pray? Because we can!
But Prayer isn't just something that we do for the fun of it. We also pray because it changes things. Prayer does make a difference. Prayer changes me for a start. If you've seen the film 'Shadow-lands' with Anthony Hopkins as C.S. Lewis, you'll have seen the trial he went through when his Wife died of (I think) Leukaemia. And Lewis went back to Oxford and carried on struggling with his faith and carried on praying, just as he had before his wife died. Then one of Lewis' sceptical colleagues questioned him on how he could still believe in God and why he still prayed; after all it clearly hadn't made any difference. To which C.S. Lewis responded by saying, "Prayer doesn't change God. It changes me." In other words, even if pray made no difference to the world in which we live; even if it didn’t influence God in the slightest, it is still good to pray because prayer changes me.
Prayer teaches me that independence and self-sufficiency aren't all that they're cracked up to be. I need other people. Prayer teaches that most of all I need God. Prayer teaches me not to be so proud as to refuse help, but to recognise that I could do with a shoulder to cry from time to time, a listening ear and a guiding hand. When I first became a Christian a lot of my friends would mockingly say that "Christianity's a crutch" and I never really knew how to respond. I wish that I had been brave enough to simply say, "Yeah, you're right, and I need a crutch from time to time." Are you brave enough to admit that you need a helping hand? Prayer changes me. It lets me see things from another perspective. It enables me to prioritise my life around God's plans and concerns. It gives me permission to take time out of the rat-race to be still and enjoy the life that so often seems to pass us by. Why Pray? Because we need to.
But the fact is that prayer does make a difference to our Situations. Some people find it difficult to accept that our small prayers can make a difference to the world. But listen to this story from Acts 12:1-17... Now, if you're anything like me, that passage may throw up more questions than it answers, but for now the important point is this - if you said to the Apostle Peter that prayer doesn't make any difference he would have split his sides with laughter, and then he would have told you about the church that prayed earnestly for him and saved his life. Prayer makes a difference, not because it is some magical incantation that we utter; not because we are so holy and such good pray-ers that we manage to twist God's arm behind his back, but because God has chosen to include his people in the work He is doing in the world; in prayer we choose to become co-workers with God.
Elaine and I met whilst we were both working for a Christian Charity in Derby. And every morning we would start with a time of prayer. And there were certain things we prayed about each morning; for instance, one guy would always pray for his dad to become a Christian, every morning he'd pray for his dad. And there were other things as well. We were planning to go to Venezuela to help a Pastor out there who was building Churches, but the problem was, none of us had any money. So, we would pray for the money to go. And we had this chart up on one of the walls with everyone's name and how much money they needed to see come in, and every time some money came in we would adjust the chart. So, every morning when we gathered to pray, we would all consult the chart and we would know just how much we needed to raise. (We were doing other things as well, like Car Washes and so on).
Well, this one morning we started to Pray and all went off to get on with our separate jobs when there was a squeal from the girls bed-room which vibrated throughout the house. So, all of us manly men went out to see what the problem was (just hoping it wasn't a mouse or a really big Spider!). And one of the girls came running out of her room with a Cheque in her hands for £500! Some lady in their church had been saving the money to send off to some missionaries when the Lord told her to send it to this girl. Well, we were all gob-smacked and went on our way shaking our heads and praising God. I went and sat on my bed and carried on preparing a Bible Study. But when I opened my Bible an enveloped fell out. No name or address, just a blank white envelope. I thought this was pretty strange, but not half as strange as finding the £200 cash inside! So, I squealed - though not quite as loud - and everyone came running to see what was going on. You know, by the end of that day we - as a team - had seen a total of £3,300 come in. Some of it in quite normal ways, others of it I guess you would call miraculous.
As I was going to bed that night, at about 11.30, I saw one of my friends on the phone but thought nothing of it. But as he put the phone down and turned to go to bed I noticed that he'd been crying - and, by the looks of it, quite a lot. I asked if he was okay and he just looked up and said, "I don't care about the money." I asked him what he meant and he looked up and smiled like I'll never forget and him simply said, "My Dad's just become a Christian." There are about 20 people that day, my wife and I included, who, if they were told prayer does not make a difference, would gladly tell you that prayer makes all the difference in the world. Why pray? Because it changes things.
God doesn't always answer our prayers as we'd expect, but as a Christian I can tell you that, as a rule, as a characteristic, God loves to answer prayer. Like any good parent, he loves to give good gifts to his children. As it says in the book, it is not possible to prove Christianity on the basis of answered prayer, because that can always be explained away as coincidence, but, as C.S. Lewis once said, the more I pray, the more the coincidences seem to happen.
How can I Pray?
Just as babies begin to speak perfectly naturally, but still need a little guidance here and there, so we can all pray - and indeed do - but maybe we could do with a few pointers.
The "Lord's Prayer"
Jesus was praying once when he was spotted by his disciples, and something about the way he prayed or what he prompted one of the disciples to say, "Lord, teach us to pray." Now, if you want to learn how to pray, there is no better teacher you could have than Jesus, so we are going to spend some time looking at the model prayer that Jesus taught. We need to start by recognising that Jesus is not here giving us some sort of perfect prayer for us to copy. Jesus starts by saying, "when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words." This isn't a prayer for us to mindlessly repeat, but it is a pattern for us to learn from.
Our Father in heaven
In prayer, we come to God as his child to enjoy time with our Father. I find it helpful to focus my thoughts in this way when I'm praying. How rude would it be if I came up to you and before even saying, "Hi, how are you?" I said, "Can I borrow £10?" or "Will you give me a lift to the shops?" When we come to prayer it's good to remind ourselves just what it is all about. You are praying to a Father who couldn't love you more than he already does and a God who created the entire cosmos.
Hallowed be your name
"Hallowed" means 'glorified' or, literally, 'considered holy.' We begin prayer with worship. To even be able to pray to God as Father is an amazing thing that I don't want to take for granted. If I'm spending some time in prayer, I like to begin by singing a few songs, telling God how much I love him and getting my priorities right. Sometimes we approach God with our shopping-lists and our problems and trials and needs, and they all seem so pressing. But when we begin our times of prayer with adoration, it forces us to slow down and focus our attention on God.
Now, I know that for some people, the idea that God wants us to praise him is quite a tricky one; after all, doesn't make God seem rather egotistical? However, I came across a great quote the other day, that I think provides a real justification and motivation for making praise a priority.
Why, then, does God want us to praise him? To 'praise' is basically to express admiration, and the purpose of expressing admiration need not be to give the person we admire nice warm feelings. We might express admiration simply because we feel it; because we cannot help expressing it or because it is a spontaneous overflowing into words of our joy and appreciation… Praise expresses delight in the admiration of that which is supremely valuable - God himself… God wants us to praise him, because he wants us to feel that delight, to grow by learning to appreciate the things that are truly worthwhile, to be happy in the contemplation of excellence.
(Keith Ward, The Living God, P. 80)
Does that make sense? So, I begin every time of prayer - just like Jesus demonstrates - with a time of praise and adoration for all that God is and all that He has done. And this is not a burdensome thing, or something to get past so I can get on with the real praying. This is the very purpose of prayer - relationship - and the deepest joy that we can experience this side of heaven.
Your kingdom come Your Will be done on earth as it is in heaven
God's kingdom is his rule, his reign. Under this heading I seek to place all of my life - my marriage, my family, my studies, my money, my friendships - under God's loving control. Jesus is talking about God's rule and reign in individual lives, but also, ultimately, for the transformation of society. So, I pray for the government, the homeless, the suffering and if I'm feeling really brave I pray about ways that I might get involved!
Give us this day our daily bread
Jesus is encouraging us to pray about our basic needs, but when I first became a Christian I had real difficulty thinking that God cared about my little problems. After all, He had a universe to sustain and countless millions of lives to watch over, does he really care about the insignificant aspects of my life? Well, there's a verse in the Bible (1 Peter 5:7) which states, 'Cast all your anxiety on [God] because he cares for you.' God is concerned about what you are concerned about. If I found out that Ellie had been worrying about something for the last week, - something that I could help her with - that she'd been losing sleep over, but she felt that she couldn't trouble me with it, I'd be really upset. That's what I'm there for, I love to give her gifts even more than she likes to receive them and I am only delighted to take care of her. God takes good care of his children.
Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us
If I come to come God and fail to take seriously those things that he takes seriously - for example, being a truly loving person - what does that say about our relationship. So, I aim to be up front with God. "Lord, I was really horrible to Phyllis today. Please forgive me." And he does!
But I also need to deal with people who have sinned against me and I have to ask God to give me a forgiving heart towards those who may have hurt me. If we really know God's forgiveness, how can we refuse forgiveness to someone else. So, I ask God to help me be as gracious towards others as he has been to me.
Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil
God knows those things that I find difficult, so there is no point hiding them. And rather than daily ask forgiveness for biting Phyllis' head off, I might ask God to help me with my foul temper, or I might say, "Lord, you know that I find those Leader's meetings difficult. Please help me really love the other leaders and to resist my cynical thoughts." If we know our weaknesses, we can pray for protection against them and for victory over temptation. We'll look at this in a later week, but under this heading I simply remember that prevention is better than cure.
For yours is the kingdom, the power and the glory forever
I like to finish with more worship. It's good to acknowledge that everything in heaven and earth belongs to the Lord.
A-C-T-S
Now, if you don't know the Lord's Prayer off by heart, or you want to start with something a bit simpler, some people find it helpful to remember the word 'A-C-T-S' to help them pray. So, we remember to start with Adoration, then we go onto Confession and then Thanksgiving, before finally giving our 'Supplications' - which simply means, asking for something. Whichever model you find helpful, just go for it. They're not meant to be straight-jackets, but patterns to help you enjoy and express your relationship with God.
When & Where?
As for the when and where, Paul says (in 1 Thessalonians 5:17) to 'pray continually,' so the short answer is always and everywhere!
Some people find it helpful to begin the day with prayer and to maybe go through the Lord's Prayer like we've just demonstrated. Others maybe pray on the go, or walking through the Park on their Lunch-break - and for that reason they might prefer an easier to remember model like ACTS. You might hate getting up in the mornings, but find it easy to stay up late at night. Well, then you might enjoy praying last thing at night. I enjoy that because I can go back through the day and thank God for all that I've seen him do. As I've tried to point out again and again, prayer is about a relationship with God, and we all relate to people differently.
As in any relationship, it is vital to have time alone together, to get to know one another and just enjoy each others company. But if prayer is about communion with God, well that doesn't have to stop, just because our official "time of prayer" comes to a close. We can open our hearts and enjoy fellowship with God on the Bus, at work, cooking the Dinner or writing a Letter. I think it's great and helpful to have a time of prayer each day - why would you not want to do that when you can spend time with God the Almighty? - but how much better to see that time of prayer as the beginning of your time with God. You don't switch off the radio once you've got it tuned into the right station (unless it's playing the Spice Girls, of course!). Maybe this is what Paul means when he writes, 'pray continually.' Maybe it's possible to spend our whole days communing with God and enjoying our relationship with him. Wow. Wouldn't that be amazing?
Let's Pray...